There are many “facts” about women that are used to define what being a woman is. I have found that not all facts are true. Let’s explore biblical truths and see just how much they differ than those facts.
Myth: “A women doesn’t need a man to be a woman!”
Truth #1. Purpose- To be a helper suitable for man
It’s only natural to start at the beginning. Before the woman was created and read why God felt she was needed.
Let’s go to Genesis chapter 2 and start at verse 15 to 20
“And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die. And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.”
At some point after creating the man and creating animals ( birds of the air, beast of the field etc) God brought the animals to Adam. Adam was given dominion over them, and he named them. Adam was not by himself in the garden but the animals alone did not prove to be enough for the man. He needed someone like himself to be a help to him. Our whole purpose came from being needed, we cant exist as a woman without mans need for us, proving that we need men.
Now let’s keep reading
“And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.” Genesis 2 v21-22
Myth: Women and Men aren’t the same, Venus -vs- Mars
Truth #2. Design- Made from the man
Both men and women were made in the image and likeness of God.
“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them”. Genesis 1v27
Men and Women are more alike than they are different. And the differences define our purpose. However, it is an ungodly mindset to focus solely on the independent natures of the man and woman distracting us from how well we are meant to work together.
“For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God”. 1 Corinthians 11v8-12
A woman was made from a part of the man. Ribs are bones, and bones give structure to our bodies. Without bones our physical bodies wouldn’t have shape, form or be able to function in motion. Spiritually the woman cannot function properly without the man, nor can the man without the woman. (Outside of marriage, Christ is the focus; inside of marriage you operate in the divine order ; “But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.” 1 Corinthians 11v3)
The design of a woman is important as it pertains to her destiny.
Myth: “A woman has the power to create her own destiny!”
Truth #3. Destiny- to be one flesh, naked, unashamed
Now back to Genesis as we tie in purpose, and design with destiny. Chapter 2 verse 22 continues with God bringing her to the man the same way he did the animals.
“And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.”
His help was revealed to him,
Verse 23:
“And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”
He named her,
THEREFORE (because of why she was made, and how she was made this is what she is meant for)
Verses 24 & 25
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.”
Cleave means to adhere closely; stick , cling to and remain faithful.
This is where the truth that a woman is meant to be a wife is first stated. And goes on to say they will be one flesh . Women are meant to be with men in order to be complete. Remember God took one of mans ribs. His core structure was now half. And if math serves me correctly 2 halves make 1 whole. Instead of thinking that we must be at some level of completeness in our minds, bodies or spirits before being married, it’s impossible for 1 whole to come together with 1 whole to be 1 whole. That leaves two. Two independent factors. However in The Lord, God has done the impossible and unites the halves to make a whole, even when we have tried to be complete without Him first and without our spouses second. When man and woman are united in Gods sight, they are then made into or caused to act as a single entity.
How a woman and a man conduct themselves in marriage is important to God,
“Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” 1 Peter 3 v7
( we will revisit 1 Peter chapter 3 again when we cover the qualities of a woman)
When women embrace that concept of being 1, then being naked and unashamed with their husband makes more sense and becomes easier. Marriage is selfless. We have to find fulfillment in our purpose rather than being discontent with having to give ourselves or devote to our husbands.
Women who attempt to shape a destiny for themselves haven’t acknowledged that our lives are predetermined. And those efforts are separate from Gods will for us.
Which leads us to this the next myth.
Myth: “I’m happy with my own and I’m never having kids!”
Truth #5. Responsibility/Role- Be fruitful , share dominion
Going back to Genesis 1 for reference now:
Verse 28-30
“And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat. And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein there is life, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so.”
The concept of being fruitful can be very complex but we will keep it simple for this and just focus on “multiply”. God sees husband and wife having children as being fruitful. The fact that women cannot conceive without the seed of a man further verifies the truth of them being dependent on each other to be obedient to God. Women having children without proper relationships with men is not fruitful.
God blessed them by making them aware of their capabilities and identifying exactly what he gave them.
They had every living creature, everything that had breath in it, to share dominion of. Man didn’t have separate plants and animals from the woman. Looking at worldly possessions and material things we must reevaluate their importance and how they cause mental as well as spiritual cloudiness and hinders our acknowledgment of what God already gave us. And even more so examining how we “lord” over things selfishly.
Myth: “A smart woman don’t take no sh–!”
Truth# 6. Qualities- Wise, Practical, Exhibiting good judgment, Careful in interest and conduct, Meek, Humble etc
A woman being classified as smart is not equal to intolerance. Going back to the way The Lord God blessed us, in the beginning putting every thing in us that we need to be pleasing and obedient to him. These are the true characteristics of a woman of God:
“House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the Lord.” Proverbs 19:14
Prudent- wise, practical , having good judgement or discernment. Careful on interests and conduct. Careful in providing for the future.
How about kind, strong, honorable, not idle, fearing God, diligent worker, takes care of the needs of her husband and children. We all have heard of “the proverbs 31 woman” but I challenge you to look closely at the character traits described.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31 v11-30
The biggest deception of society’s view on a woman’s character is that she doesn’t have to submit or give her self to her family. So much emphasis is placed on “making my own money, paying my own bills, being my own person, keeping myself covered..” That we miss the mark completely. The traits detailed above show a woman who didn’t do those things for herself but for others. God gave us gifts to give freely and blessed us to bless others. Others including your own husband and your own children.
If you’re good at organizing, organize your home. Share that with those who you are responsible to and for, first. Then give it freely to the world. Don’t walk around selfish with self seeking agendas!
Last but not least are meek and humble:
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 1 Peter 3 v1-5
Truth is a husband is suppose to have rule over the wife.
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.” Colossians 3 v18
Both of those go on to instruct the husband of his mutual submission as well. But since we are focusing on the woman, I will save that for truths about men. We must remember the importance of what we harbor IN our hearts and spirits because that is what comes out in word or deed. In order to be a woman/wife of noble character we must abstain from the worldly and sinful views as well as behaviors of society.
“And he saith unto them, Are ye so without understanding also? Do ye not perceive, that whatsoever thing from without entereth into the man, it cannot defile him; Because it entereth not into his heart, but into the belly, and goeth out into the draught, purging all meats? And he said, That which cometh out of the man, that defileth the man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man. “Mark 7 v18-23
RECAP
(biblical ) TRUTHS ABOUT WOMEN
1. Purpose-to be a helper suitable for man
2. Design- made from a man
3. Destiny- to be 1 flesh, naked & unashamed
4. Role/ Responsibility- be fruitful, share dominion (Wife/Mother)
5. Qualities- prudent, kind, meek and humble
Before accepting ungodly philosophies, and forming opinions based off of bad personal experiences, let us seek Gods word about who we really are!
what about women who can’t have kids or can’t find a husband?
These truths were not meant to ostracize or condemn any women who haven’t began the journey of living a fulfilled life. They are highlighted to shed light on the darkness of society’s views. I believe every women’s purpose, design, destiny, responsibilities, and qualities are the same. However her calling is unique. How I was called to live my life as a wife and mother won’t be the same as someone else’s. The beginning of the discovery of what Gods perfect will for my life was in my relationship with God and through my marriage.
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. Romans 12 v2
If a woman is unable to conceive or hasn’t yet been revealed to her husband it doesn’t mean she is wrong, in sin or that God looks to her with disdain. However, why those factors are so, is something only He knows. We do not know the thoughts of God. We are to have the mind of Christ and shouldn’t negatively judge others because of their differences.
I can only pray that you find clarity in the word as I have and strive to be the women you are destined to be! Remember we are in the act of becoming… Grow in grace!
May The Lord bless!
Feeding Body & Spirit 